Things I Know I Know That I Didn’t Know I Knew Last Time I Was Here

How to dump my laundry basket full of clean clothes in the filthy, rain-sodden parking lot behind the Chinese restaurant.

How to change a tire in the cold, spitting Oregon rain, on the side of a busy Portland freeway.

Even though only one tire needs replacing, four-wheel drive cars need to have all of their tires replaced at the same time.


Despite all my fuss and howling, ditching Sprint for AT&T is easy.

Despite all my hopes otherwise, I will hate AT&T just as much as Sprint.

I will hate, yes, but at least I will hate with an iPhone.

Eventually. For now, I realize that the RAZR phone is but the ultimate celebration of mediocrity.

I can wear sweaters.

My aversion to v-neck sweaters, however, is hereditary.

You can wash jeans inside out to reduce wear and fading.

Sled dogs eat High-Performance Sled Dog Food that comes in large silver bags decked out in checkered flags and florescent graphics and everything.

In the end, even High-Performance Sled Dog Food has to go somewhere. And boy does it ever.

The Ukraine is an off-the-chain vacation spot if you love being at the line where coal pollution and cloud cover meet, meet unflinchingly, and meet eternally.

I tire of my music collection, and even though I have a $15 gift card to iTunes I am wary of using it, for I fear I’ll simply end up with the same crap I already don’t want to listen to.

The two spaces that I insert at the end of a full stop are an anachronism, and one that is actually discouraged by a number of distinguished style manuals.

Oxford commas. I say unnecessary clutter, for the most part.

New photos.